Kids Are Kids! is running a Pictureproducts melamine plate fundraising activity and we’d love you to join in. Your child’s unique artwork is transformed into durable, high-quality melamine plate that will last a lifetime.
Children love eating off their individually designed plate, and as the years go by and they grow up and have their own families, their plate will bring back memories of those happy childhood years.
Your child can use photos, markers, paints and handprints to create their artworks and you can have as many copies made as you’d like, so it’s a fantastic gift idea for grandparents and other family members –and just in time for Christmas. What will your child draw?
How to get involved
Collect your A3 template/s from the Kids Are Kids! office at 26 Parry Avenue, Bateman (unfortunately we cannot post as folding will affect the production).
Your children can create their artwork at home in their own time with pens, paint, stickers, fingers, feet and photos—the brighter the better! Remember that up to 2cm will be trimmed from the inside of the drawing area at time of production.
Pay for your order online at https://pay.pictureproducts.com.au/KIDBAD/83757/ Please note a $1 payment processing surcharge will be applied per transaction. You can purchase as many plates from the one drawing as you like. Please indicate this on the top right of the template.
Please deliver your children’s drawings to the Centre when complete and ensure your order is paid for online prior to returning. Don’t forget to add your child’s name to the top right of the template.
** Drawings and payments are due by Monday 7 September 2020. Please deliver back to the Centre **
5. Once your order is completed at the Pictureproducts factory, it will be posted back to Kids Are Kids! We will let you know when your order is ready for collection. Please note that the estimated date of delivery is 14 December, 2020 (this is subject to change).
The plates are priced at $28 each and $6 of every plate ordered will go directly to helping the children of Kids Are Kids! As a not for profit organisation we rely heavily on the financial support of businesses and individuals to ensure our services are accessible to all children and their families.
If you have any questions please call Kids Are Kids! on 9313 6566.
Kids Are Kids!is a dedicated not-for-profit organisation transforming children’s lives through individual and group therapy and family support. The team at Kids Are Kids! provides Speech Pathology, Physiotherapy, Occupational Therapy and Clinical Psychology to children aged 0-13 years with disabilities or learning delays. Check out the Kids Are Kids! directory listing for more info.
Today’s Q & A session is with Taryn Watson, Women’s Health & Continence Physiotherapist and founder of FitRight. Taryn shares what inspired her to start her own business and how becoming a mum has changed her perspective on the challenges of keeping fit and active.
Hi, Taryn. Please tell us a bit about yourself
I am a physiotherapist with a masters degree in Women’s Health & Continence Physiotherapy – in other words, a pelvic floor guru! I have a particular interest in pre and postnatal health & exercise.
I have two children, a nearly four year old son and an 8 month old daughter, and although I worked as a Women’s Health Physiotherapist for nearly a decade before having children, motherhood has given me a whole new perspective on the challenges of keeping fit and active at this time of life!
I’ve lived in the Melville area nearly my whole life! I grew up in Bull Creek and, after a stint in London, I came back home and got married and we settled in Mount Pleasant. I have also always worked in this area, seeing patients at SJOG Murdoch and running exercise classes in Ardross.
What inspired you to start FitRight?
Right from the days of being a new graduate physiotherapist, I knew that I wanted to work with women during and after pregnancy. I love being part of the motherhood journey, it’s such a privilege and so rewarding!
I became a clinical pilates instructor in 2008 and started running regular studio and aqua exercise classes. I quickly realised the high demand for services like this, run by physiotherapists with extra training in pre and postnatal exercise who run small group classes and include education throughout.
My classes were always fully booked with a waitlist and there weren’t many other classes in Perth to refer on to. So after living in London for a while, I got back and started my dream – to make services like this more widespread and easily accessible. I initially had four other physiotherapists on board and now have over 30 contracted to run FitRight exercise and education classes!
What makes FitRight different to other physio/pilates classes?
I have worked hard to make sure that FitRight remains the gold standard in exercise classes for women. The physiotherapist instructors have the same women in their class each week for a six week course and not only do they know them by name, they know their medical background, birth history, pelvic floor strength etc. – and they tailor the classes specifically to suit them.
We call the things that make us unique ‘The FitRight Difference’:
Led by experienced physiotherapists
Pelvic floor and abdominal muscle assessment with a physiotherapist is a pre-requisite
All classes are low impact, and have many different levels of exercise options
Rebatable on private health
Community volunteers on hand at Baby&Me and Toddler&Me classes to care for your child/children.
How you have adapted in light of the COVID-19 situation?
COVID-19 has been a crazy time! Back in March, in the space of two weeks, we had to cancel all of our classes and create a new branch of the business called FitRight Online.
FitRight Online classes are run for pregnant women, new Mums and women of any age, in the same way as our Studio and Aqua classes – in six week courses, with small group numbers, and with a physiotherapist instructor who knows your history. The classes are run live via Zoom so that the physiotherapist can see you as you exercise and make corrections.
Thank goodness, about twelve months earlier, I had also created a private Facebook group for members – this online library of workouts and education resources was accessed by a record number of women during lockdown!
So, what’s next for FitRight?
There is something BIG in the pipeline actually… as well as continuing the exercise classes, education workshops and online resources that we currently provide, FitRight is planning to open a clinic where women can come and have their assessments! It will be called FitRight HQ, and will be in the Melville area. It will be a Centre for Women’s Health – a place where you can see Women’s Health Physios, Musculoskeletal Physios, a Lactation Consultant, an OT who can treat your Caesarean scar, and more, all in the one clinic!
As a mum to two young children, do you manage to squeeze in a bit of ‘me-time’?
I have found it very challenging over my motherhood journey to prioritise me-time! As a small business owner, my free time is often filled with work!
But I am trying very hard to prioritise little pieces of ‘me-time’ during the week, and my favourites are a refreshing power walk along the river, reading a Home Beautiful magazine with a cup of coffee or going out for dinner and drinks every couple of weeks with girlfriends!
What are some of your favourite places to go or things to do in the local area?
Once a week, I work in a co working office up at Heathcote. That has got to be the most beautiful place in Perth! I absolutely love going for a lunchtime walk around the riverfront there.
I also spend a lot of time at Deep Water Point and Point Walter with my kids. My three year old much prefers nature play to playgrounds and we have spent so many hours splashing and exploring. It’s particularly special because I also grew up in this area and I have fond memories of doing exactly the same things when I was a child!
If you loved this post, check out our Getting to Know… blog series, which features local mums and business owners.
If I had to describe in one word what meditation has done for me it would be ‘Balance‘.
My life with a busy family is constantly keeping me challenged – physically, emotionally and mentally. Introducing meditation has given me the ability to bring balance into my life on a daily basis.
It has given me better coping skills with daily issues that arise and I feel I am a better person to those around me, having more patience and being less emotionally reactive.
Supporting my emotional and mental health has in turn improved my physical health in areas of pain, strengthened immunity, blood pressure, fatigue and sleep. More importantly, I feel I am a better person to myself – less judgemental, less stressed and more rational.
I feel, see and appreciate what meditation does for me everyday, so I am committed to regular practice and integrating it into my daily routine. However, if there is a day when I am unable to meditate, I do not berate myself or feel frustrated. I accept it is not to be and move on.
My Practice
My meditation practice each day occurs in several different ways, what I like to describe as formal and informal.
I begin each day with a 10 – 20 minute meditation seated in a quiet space in my home, prior to the family arising. Meditating at this time prepares me for the day. If my sleep has been disturbed, or unsettled, meditating upon waking helps to ‘clear the clutter’ and release the mental fatigue that comes with broken sleep. It also helps to bring me clarity and as a result I find I am more productive in tasks.
Using Spot Meditations
I also do many ‘spot meditations’ throughout the day. These spot mediations happen in several ways.
If sitting in the car at traffic lights, or waiting in a queue at the supermarket, I will do three sighs, immediately feeling the tension and stress released from my body. These spot meditations bring me back to the present when I am trying to multi task and have many thoughts going through my head.
By stopping to do the breath, it releases any tension in my shoulders, neck and face, interrupts the constant stream of thought, and allows me to take a moment to reset and come back to focusing on one thing at a time. Doing this allows me to more present and a lot more productive.
My second short or spot meditation is when I am walking. I find when I am busy I tend to walk ‘anxiously’ or ‘highly aroused’, often catching my reflection and being surprised at my hunched shoulders, tense posture and stiff, jerky movements.
I now try to walk ‘consciously’, being more aware of my body and softening the muscles and movements. I do this by sighing deliberately three times and then focusing my attention first on my face, then shoulders, hips and legs. I immediately feel the tension lessen, my body soften and my movements flow more. It feels so lovely to ‘glide’ in my walking rather than be jerky, and I feel my posture improve allowing the breath to flow more freely too.
The Benefits
Meditation is a skill that I believe has been an integral part of my personal growth in the past 18 months. I feel that the physical and mental benefits I have gained have not only improved my life, but also the lives of those around me. I am committed to supporting myself, my family and those that I associate with in my oils business, in all areas of health and wellness. I believe that we need to look at all areas of our lifestyle in order to do this – sleep, diet, physical activity and toxic load within our daily activities. My regular meditation practice has helped with:
How we feel physically, mentally and emotionally determines the state of our overall health and wellbeing. My journey with essential oils has presented me with the opportunity to support and encourage others to be more proactive in their health. My intention moving forward is to introduce my community to the benefits of combining meditation and essential oils as tool to support their physical and emotional health.
The essential oils I use have many benefits such as:
Immune and respiratory support
Relieve sleeplessness and quieten a busy mind
Reduce feelings of sadness and anxiety
Promote emotional balance
Lessen stress and tension
Calm emotions
Enhance and support focus
Muscle support
Digestive support
One can draw parallels between the benefits of mediation and essential oils. I believe that through my regular meditation practice, it has allowed my body to be more receptive to the oils.
What I hope to achieve through meditation personally and professionally comes down to one thing – being able to teach others the skill and benefits of meditation, and encourage them to make it part of their daily routine in order to bring more clarity, balance and less stress into their lives.
Guided Meditation Classes
Meditation is quite simple but many are reluctant or hesitant to start, thinking it is unattainable to ’empty’ their mind, and find it difficult to get started or maintain their practice on their own. Meditation is not about thinking of nothing or clearing the mind, but more about choosing a focus for your attention and simply observing your own thought processes.
At Serenity classes, you will be welcomed into a soothing, calm environment where you will be gently guided through breath and restorative meditations. Each class has a focus oil to compliment and enhance your meditation and relaxation, finishing with cacao treats and herbal tea.
Ideal for taking some time to reconnect with yourself and like minded people!
Would you like to start a meditation practice, or maybe strengthen your current one? Whether new to meditation, a seasoned meditator or somewhere in between, SWC meditation classes and perfect for any level. Let me help you create the calm you crave through online or studio meditation classes.
Narelle is the founder of Serenity Wellness Collective and Meraki Essence and believes in a collaborative approach to supporting both physical and mental health. She is a meditation teacher, doTERRA wellness advocate and mum to three children with a passion to support mental and physical wellbeing through natural alternatives.
Narelle is a dedicated practitioner of mindfulness and meditation and through weekly classes and retreats loves to share her passion for meditation with others. She has completed the Certificate of Mindfulness Teaching (Perth Meditation Centre) , Level 1 of STM training with Tracy Whitton and is currently studying Meditation Teaching and Holistic Human Development through Higher Branches College.
Narelle credits her own daily practice to living a life with enhanced mental clarity and focus, improved immunity, better quality sleep and strengthened emotional regulation and balance.
Through SWC Narelle organises and hosts events, workshops, one day retreats and classes with natural health practitioners and motivational speakers, bringing together a collaboration of natural therapies for the community to experience.
Narelle’s contribution to the community also includes charity events hosted three times a year with a guest speaker to share their story and bring awareness to different areas of health.
To stay up to date with all things Serenity Wellness Collective, you can follow Narelle on Facebook and Instagram.
We made the most of the glorious winter weather and headed down to the Dinosaur Park, a small local play space that has more than meets the eye!
If you haven’t yet ventured to the Dinosaur Park in Palmyra, you’re missing out! Even though the park is quite small, there’s still plenty to keep the little ones and big kids occupied.
When you arrive, you’re greeted by two colourful dinosaurs that all the kids absolutely loved to climb on and slide down.
For the younger ones, there’s a playground with sandpit, slide and nest swing, but there’s no shade sail so it could get quite hot in the summer months.
There’s a path that goes around the perimeter, which provides a safe way for kids to practise their cycling skills or, as my boys did, have speed trials and races. Along the path, kids can spot several ‘fossils’ that add another great feature and element of surprise.
The older ones can make use of a basketball hoop, plus there’s a large grassy area to kick a ball around or have a picnic, with natural shade provided by the tree cover.
Essential Info
Fenced? No Toilets? No Picnic tables? Yes BBQs? No Nearest coffee Oushk (less than 1 minute walk)
Parents seek child care for a multitude of reasons. You may be going back to work, wanting your child to engage and socialise with other children, preparing them for school, or perhaps you are in need of a break, or all of the above. Remember the old adage: “It takes a village to raise a child”.
In my experience, common issues that parents face when looking for child care include:
Lack of care or quality care available in your local area or at highly sought-after centres.
You feel anxious or worried about leaving your child with “strangers”.
Finding care whose values are aligned with yours.
I feel that quality child care is as much of an art as it is a science. I think back to when I was searching for child care for my children. I wanted them to be loved and have fun in a safe environment- but foremost, I wanted them to socialise and have fun. When you are ready to make this tough decision, go ahead and ask for a tour of your shortlisted establishments and bring with you all your 5 senses as you will unconsciously need them to help you in the decision making process.
I feel that there are many benefits to having your child attend a child care service. Some of these benefits include:
1) Identity development – He or she can find his or her own identity away from you – eg. Forming bonds with people outside your family & therefore experiencing new personalities;
2) Social development – human beings learn from other human beings, so being around other children of similar ages, but from different backgrounds, can expose your child to valuable social interaction. This is where they learn to negotiate, show empathy, make friends and ultimately leads to further development of their own personality;
3) Independence for parents – Having your child settled into a loving, nurturing & stimulating service, means that you can return to work, maintain the home, or look after your own physical and mental health.
The quality that each different establishment is able to offer greatly varies from meeting the minimum requirements to services that offer teaching and experiences well beyond the minimum.
Some important points that could help you decide on an establishment are:
What is the maximum number of children in the centre
Consider if your child needs one-on-one care or care in a small group
Opening hours
How well they communicate with you;
How organised the business is
General cleanliness and tidiness
General quality of resources and playground
Meal and food offerings
How warm the staff are towards you and your child
The quality of its curriculum and activities
After using both your head and your heart in this process, you are then ready to decide on the type of care and which service you feel is best for you and your child. Best of luck!
Stephanie is a Speech Pathologist by profession, passionate owner of Amare Child Care in Bassendean, owner of soon-to-be-open Wool and Thimble School of Early Learning in Melville, mother to two fun-loving children, and wife to an understanding husband. During the week (and most weekends too), you’ll find Steph at Amare Child Care, ensuring all of our parents, children & staff are happy, healthy and well-looked after. Steph has also been meeting parents in the Melville area, dropping off enrolment packs for her new centre, due to open in late August/early September 2020. On the weekends, Steph and her family enjoy family hikes, camping and adventure sports – just generally being outdoors. Steph and her staff are passionate about providing a space where children are loved and nurtured, to give them a magical start to their lives. They look forward to continuing this dream at Wool and Thimble School of Early Learning. Stay up to date with all things Wool and Thimble via their Facebook and Instagram pages.
Musical Play is a magical way to share joyful experiences with your children whilst providing them with a wealth of benefits in their early years. As we know, play is how children explore and begin to understand the world around them. Musical play provides opportunities for your child to not only learn about music but will also support all areas of their development whilst fostering creativity and imagination. Not to mention is it SO MUCH FUN!
“Play is the work of childhood”– Jean Piget
“Play is the highest form of research” – Albert Einstein
Benefits of Musical Play
Here are just a few reasons WHY musical play should be part of everyday life for young children:
Rhythm and rhyme help to prepare children for language and reading skills
Singing nursery rhymes and songs helps to expand vocabulary
Finger play songs and Wiggles help to develop important fine motor skills
Music can help to build the foundations for literacy and numeracy
Movement to music helps to strengthen gross motor skills, muscles, balance and spatial awareness
Music improves general mood and ability to concentrate
Music aids in the development of social and emotional competence
Before you start thinking, “It’s too hard”, “I can’t sing”, “I can’t play an instrument” …let me inspire you!
Everyday examples of Musical Play
Here are some ides of how easy it is to engage in musical play with your child at home and how you will expose them to different elements of music:
Narrate Your Day Using Songs
Use songs to commentate what you and your children are doing throughout the day e.g. bath time, getting dressed, in the highchair, hanging up the washing, going to the shops etc. This helps to reinforce and establish a routine and will provide comfort to your child as once they hear you singing a song, they will associate it with what will happen next. Also making up the silliest of songs and being spontaneous (even while doing the grocery shopping), will add a FUN FACTOR!
Wiggles & Tickles
Engage in Wiggles: rhymes where you wiggle each finger (or toes) in order from thumb to pinkie, or Tickles: rhymes that involve tickling body parts such as the tummy, feet or under the arm.
Keep Your Baby Engaged
When singing to babies make sure to face them and engage in eye contact to further strengthen your bond and create a special connection on an emotional level. They will love seeing your face, and their face will light up when they see you singing and playing with them!
Play Pretend
While you are playing with your child’s cuddly toys or teddies, you could pretend to put them to sleep by singing a lullaby. You could talk about why you might rock the cuddly toy slowly and gently, rather than fast and rough. This will help support their understanding of Tempo (speed) and Expression in music.
Experiment with Sounds
Encourage your children to bang on the pots and pans and include a variety of different types of materials such as ceramic, metal, or wooden utensils. This helps expose your child to Timbre (the character or quality of a musical sound).
High to Low
When your child is sliding down a slide, make sounds with your voice that slide from high to low, matching their movement. This helps to make a connection between physically being up high and sliding down low, with the concept of the Pitch of your voice. See if they can make similar sounds exploring their own voice. You can also try this activity while they are playing on a seesaw or swing.
Row, Row, Row Your Boat
Sit your child in a washing basket and rock it back and forth, while singing “Row your boat”. This fosters wonderful imaginative play! A washing basket can also be a car, an aeroplane…endless possibilities.
Encourage Exploration
Have a small collection of a variety of percussion instruments scattered around your play space for your child to explore and enjoy.
Use Books as Inspiration
Read your favourite books and think of instruments or things around the house that could create a sound effect for your story. “We’re Going on a Bear Hunt” and “Alpacas with Maracas” are some of our favourites!
Get Bouncing!
Bounce your child on your knees while saying a simple nursery rhyme. You are providing your child with exposure to Beat and Rhythm. The beat being the bouncing up and down and the rhythm being the words you are saying. Older children can bounce their own teddy or soft toy on their lap in time with the beat while you both say the rhyme. See if they can do it themselves in time with the beat.
Play with Height & Pitch
While building a tower of blocks, you could play a pitched instrument such as a xylophone up the scale, so that as your child’s tower gets higher, the music you are playing gets higher. This will give your child a visual representation of the concept of Pitch (the degree of highness or lowness of a tone).
Create Patterns
Create patterns with things you can find around the back yard such as stones, rocks, sticks, flowers, leaves. Can you clap or tap these patterns? Creating patterns like these are laying the basis for the fundamentals of rhythm in the future.
Feel the Rhythm
If your child likes to “hammer” or “fix things”, build upon that by tapping different rhythms – short and fast or long and slow.
For older children, they could practise clapping your weekly shopping list e.g. Milk, eggs, apples, bread. Watermelon, grapes, butter, carrots. This also helps reinforce rhythmic concepts.
“A child who sings is a happy child.” – Enrique Falabella
There are so many wonderful musical play activities you can do with your children right in the comfort of your home. Sing, play, be in the moment, experiment, explore, imagine and share in the joy that music brings, together!
Michaela Ivory is a local mother of three children aged 8, 5 and 2, and is a music teacher passionate about the inclusion and importance of music in the early years. She teaches, “Crescendo” a community outreach music education program for the West Australian Symphony Orchestra at two primary schools in Perth’s south, as well as teaching her own early childhood music classes for 0-6 year olds, Nurturing Notes. Michaela has a double degree in Music and Education and holds a Level One Orff Schulwerk Certification, as well as a First Steps in Music Certification. She loves to share her passion with parents, teachers, educators, and families, through sharing her songs, rhymes and teaching ideas on her blog, as The Musical Mum.
There comes a point in time where your home may no longer suit your family’s needs and/or lifestyle. Here are my top tips to get you in the mindset of planning for the long term, whether it be a renovation or a new home.
Location
Before you spend a cent, make sure you like your location. Quiet friendly streets with a family might be more beneficial long term than river views on a busy arterial street.
Planning
Plan a home that suits you for the next 15 years. Think about the function for small children to late teens. Separate living areas allow space or design open plan living areas that can be closed off, for example by barn doors.
Storage
Build more than you need – you will never regret it. Did you know good storage is worth more than a third bathroom on the real estate market and costs a lot less! Think mud rooms, walk-in linens, window seats and larger garages.
Style
Pinterest and Instagram are great for inspiration but, if you want to find your style, look in your wardrobe. Look at items and colours of your favourite pieces to give you a sense of what you will love for a long time to come.
Wish List
Work out what are your non-negotiables and prioritise these in your budget. If you can’t afford the items immediately, add provisions so that you can install them later. An example of this could be a gas point and planned area for a built in BBQ Kitchen in your alfresco.
Ask for Help
It is not overindulgent to hire an Interior Designer to help. Believe me – you will second guess yourself a lot when there are a lot of decisions, and some of us will google till midnight, making sure we picked the right exterior colour. Professionals will save you making mistakes that could be costly, but will also point out things to incorporate in the early stages. For example, putting power points in the bedroom in the right location so that you can have lamps on your bedside without extension cords.
Kelly Negus is the Interior Designer behind Connected Interiors, is a mother of two vibrant children, Zara and Clancy, and has lived in Alfred Cove for 14 years.
Kelly is a huge advocate that stunning interior design needn’t cost the earth. Renowned for being a meticulous researcher and a bargain-hunter, she loves helping clients save on their renovations, extensions and new homes.
Kelly has worked in the property industry since 2007, both designing, renovating and building family homes and furnishing apartments for owner occupiers, displays and investors. She has completed studies at the Interior Design Institute – Australia.
A Channel Mum survey found that 90% of mums feel lonely and 80% want more mum friends.
We are wired for connection and despite the fact that we’re rarely physically alone as mothers, many mothers feel very lonely and isolated.
This is because loneliness doesn’t require you to be alone. Loneliness occurs when you have fewer relationships than you desire in your life, or they are not of the quality or depth you desire.
The key is really emotional connection.
If we feel we aren’t understood or heard, or that we can’t be our authentic selves with anyone, then we’re much likely to feel lonely and isolated.
The good news is that we have complete control over changing this situation and feeling more connected by getting out there and making new friends.
But it’s so awkward…
The same Channel Mum survey found that a third of mums have never taken the initiative or started a conversation that led to friendship.
It’s just so awkward sometimes, isn’t it?
Are you ever lost for words when starting a conversation with someone new?
Are you consumed with worrying about whether they will like you or judge you?
Do you find it hard to approach the groups of mums that seem to know each other so well?
Or, are you so exhausted that it just feels all too hard?
Meeting new mum friends can feel like dating sometimes, and yes, it’s really hard to have a proper conversation when you’re constantly interrupted by the little loves of your life.
But it’s worth it.
Because real, fulfilling connections in our lives have a positive impact on our physical, mental and emotional wellbeing and even impacts the way we parent. Plus, it’s always worthwhile to remember that we are modelling how to have healthy relationships for our children.
Before you even leave the house…
Many of us unintentionally make connecting with others much harder than it needs to be.
How?
By holding onto stories and beliefs that make connecting scary and risky.
For example:
“I’m so awkward”
“I never know what to say”
“No one will want to talk to me”
“I’m not good enough to be a friend to these mums”
“Making friends is so hard”
“Everyone else already knows someone here. They aren’t looking for new friends”
“I need to be more _______ for them to like me”
“If I invite someone to catch up they might reject me”
“Everyone rejects me”
“I don’t want to bother them”
When we tell ourselves these things, our brains will do anything to talk us out of actually trying to connect so we don’t have to feel any emotional pain.
What are your beliefs about connecting with others?
Are they helping you connect confidently or making it really scary to connect?
If you were confident about connecting, what would you believe instead?
Let me give you an example.
Let’s say you believe that making friends is so hard. Your brain will constantly be looking for evidence to back this up (it likes to be right!). So even if you do make a friend, it will perceive this as an exception.
If you think that making friends is hard, you’ll feel that it takes a lot of effort and perhaps is even a hassle. You may attribute the fact that it’s hard, to something that is wrong with you, which makes it even harder to put yourself out there.
If, instead, you chose to believe that making friends is easy and that you are friendly and interesting, you would feel much more willing to talk to someone new and see what happens. You’re also much less likely to take it personally if things don’t progress.
Your beliefs and stories can change how you feel, how you act and of course, the outcome.
I want to also take a moment to focus on the fear of being judged. This is one of the most common fears people have, so it’s not limited to mums!
If you fear being judged, know this; when someone judges you, it’s not about you. It’s about them and what they think you should be like (which is irrelevant). Plus, it is usually related to something they are judging themselves for. If someone does judge you, then you’ve just received some important information about them and you may decide they are not the right person to build a friendship with. However, most people aren’t judging us, so it’s more helpful to assume the best rather than the worst.
Where to find new mum friends
When you’re ready to take your empowering beliefs and stories on the road and find new mum friends, here are some places to start:
Mothers groups, playgroups or other support groups in your local area
Online forums (I have found online friendships to be very supportive, but you may also be able to organise to meet in person if the forum is a local one)
Neighbours, friends of your friends, other community groups or activity groups you are part of (exercise classes, art classes, volunteering groups, book clubs, etc.)
The places you go in your daily routine – at the park, the library, in a queue, at the play area at the shopping centre
Your children’s school or activities
Online friendships are great, but nothing can replace face-to-face connection so make sure you have some of those.
Ok, I’ve found a place to potentially meet other mums. What should I do now?
So, you’re now in a place where you can connect with others. What do you actually do and say?
Firstly, take the focus off yourself, and be curious and interested in others. This leaves less headspace for your fears and self-doubts.
Then:
Be available for connection – make eye contact with others (not your phone).
Offer smiles readily (who doesn’t love to receive a warm smile!)
Find something you genuinely like about a mum or her child and offer a compliment.
Ask questions. Start simple; “what’s your daughter’s name?”, ”do you live in the area?”, “have you been coming here for a while?”. As the conversation and relationship progresses, you can ask about their background, opinions and experiences. Keep it relevant to the conversation and keep the conversation flowing in-between so it’s not like an interrogation.
Look for things you have in common.
Really listen to what they’re saying. Observe body language and the emotion in what they’re communicating. Often when people are talking, we aren’t really listening because we’re too caught up in thinking about what we will say next. Just listen and respond once you have fully understood.
Tell them about you. Self-disclosure is a great way to build trust and connection. Just don’t overwhelm them with all your deepest darkest secrets straight away. Share honestly and openly to a level that you feel comfortable with. People can feel when you are being yourself and it’s magnetic!
Be generous and helpful. Pick up something they dropped, retrieve their child’s hat, help them get the pram down the stairs, or offer information that would help them (if they ask for it).
Once you have decided that you want to get to know someone better, then you can invite them for a playdate or coffee, connect with them on social media so you can chat more, ask them to join you at an activity (for you or your children), or simply offer to exchange numbers.
Come and join us in the Melville Mums Facebook group– it’s a friendly, supportive space where you can meet other mums, ask for advice and seek recommendations on local family-friendly places to go & things to do.
Have realistic expectations
Relationships take time and are built on a series of conversations, so keep your expectations realistic. You’re not likely to have a new best friend straight away! That’s ok and is no indication of where the friendship might go.
Also, know that you won’t click with everyone. We have enough to fit into our lives, without having to worry about friendships that don’t feel right. Let them go. It’s best for everyone.
Lastly, remember that mum life is full. You know yourself that there are seasons where you can only barely get through the essentials. If someone doesn’t reply to your messages, or declines your first invitation to catch up, don’t automatically assume they don’t want to get to know you. She might be feeling vulnerable herself, or she may be struggling to stay on top of everything in her own life. Just try again or move on if you feel that’s better. Your tribe is out there and you will find them.
You, lovely mum, deserve to feel connected and loved by people who are right for you. Make connection a priority in your life and you will see so many benefits.
Louise East is a Mindset and Life Coach for mums who want to feel happier, calmer, more confident and more fulfilled. She loves helping mums uncover and rewrite the stories and beliefs that are no longer serving them so they can achieve their goals and grow in self-belief and self-love. She is awife, mum to a 5 year old, step mum to 3 young adults and now even a super cool, young grandma to 2 gorgeous babies! Louise offers complimentary 30 mins calls to mums who want to explore how they can honour their needs and create the life they want. To schedule your call email louise@moretomum.com.au. You can find more help and inspiration for mum life at https://www.moretomum.com.au or follow Louise on Facebook or Instagram @moretomum.
If you have young children, playgroup can be a great way to meet other local families and let the little ones play in a fun, safe environment.
Below is a comprehensive list of local playgroups in the Melville area (by suburb). Simply click on the playgroup name for more information such as cost, session dates and appropriate age range. Many playgroups are members of Playgroup WA so this is another great resource for local information.
If you think art is just for fun, think again! Below are just some of the benefits of participating in art-based activities, and they don’t apply only to kids! It might be time for us all to pick up that paintbrush and tap into our creativity.
1. Encourages creative thinking
Creative thinking uses a part of the brain that affects emotional perception and visual imagery. Decision making and problem solving skills are continually called upon in art as there are many decisions to be made about colour, design and materials.
2. Builds confidence & self-esteem
Art develops a child’s perceptual abilities, extending their vision to see elements such as line, shape, colour and composition. But most important is the feeling of success a child gets from completing their artwork. Not only does it build confidence and self-esteem but it gives them a sense of accomplishment that can have ongoing affects in other areas of their life.
3. Sparks innovation
Art teaching in school is sometimes viewed as an optional extra but is essential for successful societies of the future. Research acknowledges creativity as crucial for innovation and, through curiosity and imaginative play, children can build on their creative and critical thinking processes, paving the way for future innovation.
Creativity, problem solving and developing our imaginations are as essential as math and reading if we expect kids to solve the problems of the 21st century.
– Professor Ewing, University of Sydney
4. Improves literacy, numeracy & social skills
There are growing concerns in the educational community that the increased focus on literacy and numeracy, that nationalised testing has brought, has resulted in funding cuts to education in the arts due to limited resources. Research conducted in the United States showed that not only can arts education improve skills in numeracy and literacy, but also show improvements in social development through teamwork, confidence and self-worth. Research also showed that students who study art are 3 to 4 times more likely to be recognised for academic achievement.
Well-known Perth artist and educator, Jane McKay, began the Creative Kids Art Club in 2011 to meet the demands of parents and to provide access to specialised art education for children aged 5 to 14 through after school and holiday classes.
The classes aim to fill that gap in creative education by providing quality art projects that give children the opportunity to unleash their creativity. The projects span a wide range of media from painting on canvas, clay work, 3D sculpture, printmaking and craft to weaving and sewing. Each term has a range of exciting new projects, so the children develop skills and techniques through new creative experiences.
For even more local kids activities and classes, head to our online business directory, or check out the What’s On calendar for events happening in and around the Melville area.
Kids Are Kids! is running a Pictureproducts melamine plate fundraising activity and we'd love you to join in. Your child's unique artwork is transformed...
